Bloggery Schemes And Princesses

The image posted here was originally drawn with the intent of being used in my Princess Bride review. My scheme involved a video review full of still images similar to the one posted. I have since revised this plan on account of how many centuries that would take to do (three) and the fact that I plan to review other movies.

(1920x1080 version of image is available at my DA account. Click image for 728x410 version)

I now scheme to go more the route of my previous blog post, which is basically just a regular blog post, but illustrated. That's much more doable, could be converted into a video later if I felt like it, and hey, people can read it when they're not supposed to because it's all quiet and stuff.

Not that I endorse that sort of thing.

But blog posts about what I'm going to blog about are boring, so yeah, about the image. I don't want to say how it would have fit in the review because I still might do a similar joke, but it's Princess Jasmine from Aladdin proposing to Tiana from The Princess And The Frog.

Not to sound too girly or anything (being the manly man that I am), but these are my two favorite Disney princesses. I was a big fan of Aladdin as a kid, which shouldn't come as a surprise. It was a good movie with a magic genie. Of course I liked it. I even liked the second straight to video movie, because the genie came back to do more magic and that bird I liked became a good guy instead of being stuck in some lamp. I suspect I wouldn't like the sequel as much now, but maybe I would. It's not like I'm expecting much from it.

As for Jasmine, she was an attractive woman with long hair, a cool outfit, a strong personality, a pet tiger, and was in that movie I liked with that genie who was awesome because he could do magic and junk. She was cooler to me than any other Disney Princess one could choose from. I also liked her more than Aladdin. That guy used a wish to be a phony and turn his monkey buddy into an elephant. Jackass.

Tiana, however, usurped Jasmine as my favorite princess. Her humble beginnings, determination, strong work ethic, cooking talents... I could go on, but there's just a lot to like about her as a character. Jasmine's a good character too, and I still like her, but a lot of what I like about her is superficial and due to her environment and friends (GENIE!) more than her directly.

Tiana stands on her own. You could remove Tiana from her environment and I don't think my like of her would be diminished. Take away the magic and Agrabah, however, and my like of Jasmine would be. She'd still be cool and likable, but I don't think she stands as tall on her own as Tiana does.

Who do you think are the best princesses, Disney or otherwise? Don't worry about your manliness status. There are tools and video games in the previous post, so you should be fine.

My Name Is Dan Shive. You Read My Blog. Prepare To... Um... Read More?

I have finally seen The Princess Bride. I intend to record my thoughts on it tomorrow, and make the video during my leisure time over the next week (as opposed to playing video games or hopscotch).

The video itself will mostly be narration with still images that I've drawn or appropriate stills from the movie, but there is some animation planned. This isn't intended to be a huge task, so what animation there will be will be limited, but I will do my best to give a good presentation. Most of what I want to animate is my avatar as the host, which is relatively simple given that I'll be using Flash and will essentially be posing a puppet. The hardest part is the lip sync, but that's actually not that hard to do in Flash. It's just that it's about as tedious as watching paint dry.

Given yesterday's sound test, I'm going to go ahead and get right to working on this review over making the "How To Draw A Dragon" test. I already know what I need to know, so I'd rather leave that on the back burner and get the review done first.

In Defense Of Astrid

Yes, this is another How To Train Your Dragon post, but there's actually more to it than that. One of the comments to my previous post expressed disappointment in Dreamworks over having Astrid, a strong female love interest, in the movie. The reasons given were that she wasn't in the book and the "strong female love interest" angle has been done many times before.

(Although, to be fair, 99% of the film wasn't in the book)

I feel this is something I need to counter. Not only do I believe that Astrid is a good character, I believe she's an example on how to present a character like this without being tired and cliché.

I'm avoiding major spoilers here, but I am discussing a character and how they fit in the plot, so yeah. MINOR SPOILERS be ahead.

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 1 - She is not out to prove what girls are capable of. With the exception of the main character, the village is full of badasses. Male, female, adult, child, they all either kick ass or aspire to, and the only one who is told they're a fool for doing so is the male lead, Hiccup. Nobody questions whether girls can kick ass. They know they can and respect them for it.

 2 - She is not a jerk. Movies and TV shows often seem to think that the only way to portray a strong female character is to make them an uncaring, self-centered jackass. We as an audience are supposed to view them as strong and possibly even as role models, but if you took those same characters and made them men, they'd simply be jerks. There are, however, plenty of shows and movies that understand that being strong doesn't mean you have to be a jerk, and this movie is one of them.

 3 - She is not tacked on. Astrid is a key character in the movie and is not an afterthought. She contributes to the story and isn't just there for Hiccup to fawn over.

 4 - Relative to the rest of the vikings, she is fully clothed. While her outfit is unique, so is Hiccup's. It helps them stand out as main characters. I question the lack of a fur vest or cape, but at least she's not showing off her midriff. A lot of strong, action-oriented women wind up in skimpy outfits, but Astrid is not one of them. This is an especially good thing considering she looks like she's at most fourteen years old.

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I would not mind seeing more characters portrayed as Astrid was with the rest of the characters treating them as Astrid was. I can understand the "she wasn't in the book" complaint, particularly if one was fond of the supporting male character whose role she effectively fills. Independent of that, however, I think she was a good character and a good example of a strong female character.

A Different Way To Train Your Dragon

Note: Blogger's images seem to be having trouble showing up. If you can't see the image for this post, click here to see it on DA.

As I've stated, I loved the How To Train Your Dragon (HTTYD) movie. While watching the end credits, I noticed that it claimed to be based on a book. Given that I had become an instant HTTYD-fanboy, I decided to look into it.

It turns out there's a series of children's novels, and they've gotten good reviews on Amazon. What they are not, however, is the same as the movie. After a bit of research, it's very clear to me that the movie was more "inspired by" than "based on" the books.

There is common ground between them, but if you changed the names of the movie and its characters, I suspect the only significant things they'd have left in common is the presence of vikings and dragons. I have not read the books, so there may be subtle similarities that I am not aware of, but it really does sound like they're the apples and oranges of family friendly viking-themed dragon fiction (a genre I am certain is massive in stature).

I find this interesting, as book fans have historically been strongly opposed to movies that deviate heavily from the source material. There are Harry Potter fans who foam at the mouth with rage over the general lack of house elves in the movies and Lord Of The Ring fans who want the head of Peter Jackson, but those movies are guilty of very minor divergences relative to the HTTYD movie. Given the overwhelmingly positive reviews of the HTTYD movie, I wonder what fans of the books think. It also makes me wonder what the author of the books, Cressida Cowel, thinks.

Of course, these might not be like the Harry Potter books with readers of all ages. If it's mostly just kids reading them, I doubt there'd be as much fanboy rage in the face of unfaithful adaptations. I've also never seen a bookstore overflowing with people as a result of a HTTYD book release or people getting lynched for revealing HTTYD spoilers. Nonetheless, there's probably someone, somewhere out there who is gritting their teeth with rage over this movie.

Personally, I liked the movie as it was, and I'm glad they deviated from the source material as much as they did. It's a little weird to be saying that. I'm generally okay with movies deviating from their source material in order to make movies that, frankly, don't suck. What I usually do want to stay faithful, however, are the themes and the characters, and it doesn't sound like HTTYD did that.

That said, the movie is still awesome, and I still plot to see it in 3d.

How To Train Your Dragon

It's late and I need to get some sleep, so this is going to be a very quick review. Fortunately, my review ultimately boils down to five words:

It's awesome. Go see it.

How To Train Your Dragon is the definition of a good family movie. It has something for everyone. I honestly can't think of a single person I know who I wouldn't recommend this movie to. Granted, it's 1:30 in the morning and there are likely some curmudgeons I could think of if I were more awake, but it's rare I can say that of any movie while in any state of mind.

I don't want to give the impression that it's the greatest movie of all time or anything. I'm sure there are plenty of nits one could pick. Thing is, I don't care about those nits or the picking thereof. This movie was fun, cute, relatable, action-packed... it was simply good.

I saw it in 2d, and plan to go back and see it in 3d. I will be acquiring it on DVD when it comes out, and, merchandising willing, I will have a figurine of the main dragon sitting on my desk sometime in the near future. In case it's not obvious, I liked this movie.

Ow, My Geek Cred!

Ladies and gentlemen, I have a bone chilling revelation to unveil. Or, well, repeat, assuming you follow me on Twitter. Clarifications that undermine the dramatic tension of what I am trying to say aside, my point is this:

I have never seen The Princess Bride.

If you are anything like most people I know, that sentence rocked you to your very core and blew your mind. It's not that I specifically haven't seen it, but that anyone hasn't. It would be similar to saying I haven't seen Apocalypse Now, Tron, Labyrinth, Planet Of The Apes or Rocky.

By the way, I totally haven't seen Apocalypse Now, Tron, Labyrinth, Planet Of The Apes or Rocky.

As you  may have guessed, I've missed a lot of movies. I don't see every movie that comes out, and I'm not big on renting them. I'm more likely to watch TV shows on DVD and play video games when with friends.

That said, however, there are certain movies I really should see. My geek cred is crumbling all around me, and it must be salvaged! Readers of this blog, I ask you: What nostalgic movies must I see to redeem myself, assuming I have not already? You know, beyond what I've listed.

Please let me know here, via e-mail or Twitter what you think I need to see. Based on these suggestions, I will gradually make it my mission to seek out and watch the most suggested movies, posting my thoughts about them here as I do.

Keeping Them Real

According to TV Guide, Disney is banning breast implants from Pirates Of The Caribbean 4. Or, at least, for a particular group of actresses. From the sound of the requirements, the women will likely be involved in dancing or some other form of activity where the presence of implants could be obvious. From the article:

The potential ladies will also have to undergo a test involving jiggling and jogging to determine their breasts' authenticity

I am 100% certain the only concern here is historical accuracy. After all, it's common knowledge that silicone implants of this nature weren't used before 1962.

The obvious joke here is "I wish I was the casting director!" I believe that's a bit shortsighted. What if you're not sure about someone? What if an actress misreads the look on your face and accuses you of suspecting something? What if she's not misreading your face? It's a scenario where you'd potentially have hundreds, if not thousands, of attractive young women knowing for certain that you're staring at their chests and judging their authenticity. The hostility generated could power all of LA.

...Okay, yeah, I'd still totally take the job. I'm only human, after all.

In all seriousness, while I was made aware of this via TVGuide.com, there are a lot more details in the original source of this information, The New York Post. It's actually somewhat disturbing what they went through to "enhance" Keira Knightley. I'm sure she would have been just fine without it.

The Monster That Challenged The World

I recently stayed up late watching an old monster movie called The Monster That Challenged The World. I tweeted as I did so, and while those tweets contained many spoilers, this movie was made in 1957. I think the statute of limitations on SPOILERS! has passed. (Incidentally, all of my tweets about this movie are compiled at the bottom of this post)

They don't make movies like this one anymore, and that's probably a good thing. This wasn't the worst movie I've ever seen and it was probably pretty good by old-school standards, but there was plenty of horrible, horrible things about it.

ALICE In Wonderland! ALICE!

I follow several RSS feeds about movies, TV, games, etc in an effort to stay on top of pop culture and not look like a dang fool. As a result, I have been keeping tabs on the performance of Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland, a movie I found I really enjoyed.

I didn't expect to enjoy it as much as I did. Thanks to the marketing of the film, I expected the focus to be unduly on Johnny Depp and the Mad Hatter. He was focused on in the commercials, every poster I saw focused on the hatter... I fully expected this to spiritually be Willy Wonka 2: The Wonkening.

My Thoughts On Avatar

I have been directed to many blogs, editorials and news articles regarding James Cameron's Avatar and the controversy thereof. I have decided that it is absolutely, positively, and incontrovertibly necessary for me to give my in-depth impression of the film.

Ooh, ooh, lookit the 3D! Wow, an alien world! It's so shiny and immersive! Those animals are kewl and realistic looking! Man, it would be neato to have an avatar... dude, Jake is learning all this stuff and getting better and better and oops he fell that is HILARIOUS! OMG FLYING O_O This is fun and awesome and ACTION! Wow, what a fight! Fun and shiny and... story? There's a story? I didn't notice; I was too busy having fun visiting Pandora.

Those are my highly intellectual thoughts on the subject. I hope you have found it enlightening.

I Saw Sherlock Holmes!

But enough about that. Does anybody else find themselves hyper-aware of their own movement after sitting through a movie? Seriously, it's like after I get out of my seat I'm aware of movements I would normally take for granted. It doesn't happen with every movie, but it did with this one, and with almost every CGI film I've ever seen. If ever I were to participate in an ill-conceived ballet competition, it appears my pre-prance preparation would consist primarily of watching Shrek 2.

Oh, and for those who care, the movie was entertaining. So long as you enter the theater aware that you are about to witness a re-imagining of Sherlock Holmes as a deductive action hero and not as the traditional Holmes, you should be in for a fun ride.

Howard The Duck - Should He Live Again?

Howard the Duck was a 1986 movie made by Lucasfilms. It starred a duck named Howard (of course) who lived in a universe where duck lives as man (insert dramatic thunderclap), but is brought to our universe by some sort of science fiction macguffin. It was based on the character of the same name from Marvel Comics who actually dates back to 1973. While the comic character still turns up from time to time, the movie was considered a horrendous, career poisoning flop.

One major issue with the movie (beyond the story, script, and all that jazz), is simply the duck suit effects. Not only is Howard not convincing or particularly emotive, he's unpleasant to look at. He is also incapable of letting loose with his quack-fu, a manner of martial arts that should easily take down the likes of even Chuck Norris. In this movie, there's no way he can unleash a proper fury.

But what about today?

Ignoring for a moment the obvious option of traditional animation (as pointed out by several critics at the time), we now have fairly convincing CGI and motion capture technology. If you'll recall Yoda in the Star Wars prequels, the technology does exist to make someone like Howard into a convincing fighting bad-ass. It also would allow him to be more expressive and natural in general.

Now, I'm not suggesting you could take the same script, toss in CGI Howard and call it a day. Hell no. I'm suggesting that the lack of limitations imposed on Howard by virtue of him not being some guy in a suit would give greater flexibility to what's done with him, and give the writer's more to work with. There could be cool action sequences, the comedic timing would be better... actually, they could use a similar script and it would be better. It wouldn't be good, but the basic addition of range to Howard would improve on the original.

It could still suck even with a new script and CGI, but this is ultimately my point: I believe there are movies out there that were crippled by the technological limitations of their time. The limitations affected both where they could go with the script and how scenes could be executed. Are there flops out there that, given modern technology, should possibly be given another chance? If so, is Howard among them?

Rant - Star Trek Special Edition Case Insert

Ok, I know I just wrote in length about a DVD and I don't want to give the wrong impression about what manner of blog this is, but this rant is gonna happen.

I was generously given the new Star Trek (Two-Disc Digital Copy Edition) for Christmas. It is worth noting on the side that this came with quite an enjoyable movie that I absolutely love, a digital copy of it and a ton of extras, but frankly, that is all entirely ruined by the horrible, horrible packaging. And no, I refer not simply to the image I have included. It gets far, far worse.

Review - Something, Something, Something, Dark Side

Something, Something, Something, Dark Side
Studio: 20th Century Fox
Release Date: December 22, 2009
Version Reviewed: 2009 DVD
Run Time: 54 minutes
Rating: Not Rated (but intended for mature audiences)